Kong: Skull Island - movie review
Kong: Skull Island
Plot: A team of scientists explore an uncharted island in the Pacific, venturing into the domain of the mighty Kong, and must fight to escape a primal Eden.
Cast: Tom Hiddleston, Samuel L. Jackson, Brie Larson
Director: Jordan Vogt-Roberts
Certificate: 12A (moderate threat, violence, infrequent strong language)
Runtime: 1hr 58 mins
Release Date: Thursday 9th March 2017
"Twas beauty that killed the beast." I think Jordan Vogt-Roberts took one look at that line from the original King Kong, threw it out the window and went back to smashing his giant action figures together. That's basically how this new imagining of Kong works. The original storyline is nowhere to be found and we are left with a pure summer (technically Spring) blockbuster that prefers action over story. I have to say, I love me some detailed character arcs and emotional stories but you give me brawling and insane action set pieces, I am one happy guy.
Let's be brutally honest here, every single character that isn't either John C. Reilly, Samuel L. Jackson or a CGI created monster, is utterly useless. They serve the minutest purpose to the overall story and as far as actual character development is concerned, HA! There's none. You'll have more chance finding comprehensive political plans in the White House. Tom Hiddleston leads the way as a retired SAS soldier who is good at hunting. That's it. That's all the film gives us about his character. They hint towards a plotline about his grandfather (I think) but apart from that, Hiddleston plays the most generic soldier imaginable. His performance is fine but considering his character is about as interesting as lukewarm dishwater, his focus was clearly more directed towards having some fun on set rather than gear his performance to a much beloved character or psych himself up for awards contention. Believe me, you will not hear 'Kong: Skull Island - Nominated for Best Picture'. The most entertaining aspect to Hiddleston's Conrad (Yes. His name is Conrad) is when the action is at the highest level. I'm not even kidding when I say that there is a genuine moment involving a gas mask and a samurai sword that might just be the greatest slow-mo action sequence or the worst. I'm still undecided. Also, is this film a way for a handful of MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe) characters to have a little meet up outside of that franchise? Loki, Captain Marvel, Nick Fury and Corpsman Dey all appear in quite significant roles. Brie Larson (slowly becoming one of my favourite actresses working today) slides alongside Hiddleston in regards to compelling characterisation. All we learn about Mason Weaver is that she takes photos of the war and hates the Vietnam conflict. Come the big battle, her purpose in the film is about as helpful as a fart in a wind tunnel. As I said, this film truly is the pinnacle of supplying the most fascinating of characters. Larson is absolutely adequate for the role. There wasn't a point where I thought that Larson was destined for the role but so far, anything she appears in, she never fails to give an uninspired performance. It proves she's an actress of all genres. Room (Drama), 21 Jump Street (Comedy) and now Kong, a giant action spectacle.
But let's talk about the two best human characters in Kong. Firstly, Samuel L. Jackson vs. Kong is a primetime event that I would pay tooth and nail to watch. My money's on Jackson. His character of a hardened Army General had a fair bit of depth than most characters. The war in Vietnam has changed him and violence is now the only call he answers to so as soon as he's offered a chance to avenge the destruction a certain hairy beast causes, Jackson's character seizes the opportunity. It's no surprise that when a studio gives Jackson a role like this, it's a performance he can do in his sleep. He's brilliantly entertaining though. However, the most unintentionally hilarious part of his character was the unique camera-work especially around his eyes. Whenever something serious is occurring in relation to Jackson, we get this bizarre and extreme close-up of his eyes as we witness the fury and anger seep out. It's a cool idea but so heavy handed. However, my absolute favourite in this film was John C. Reilly. From the trailers, I wasn't sure that his character would fit the tone. He came across too jokey and for a trailer that had a giant ape smashing helicopters out of the sky, his character seemed a little too unbelievable. Fortunately, considering how the tone of this film is non-serious and very self aware means that Reilly fit in perfectly. He's hilarious but also incredibly sincere making him the only decently developed character (Jackson was more entertaining than well realised). That about does it for the humans. The film sprinkles in a couple of well-known names like John Goodman, Corey Hawkins, Jason Mitchell and Toby Kebbell and they're all serviceable yet nothing special.
FACT: Samuel L. Jackson repeats his line, "Hold onto your butts," from Jurassic Park, which is also about an island inhabited by giant creatures.
As far as Kong is concerned, this film definitely belongs to him. Terry Notary supplies the motion capture for Kong and does a terrific job. When Kong throws down, he THROWS DOWN! This is the most brutal we've seen Kong and he's only a youngling at this stage. Peter Jackson's interpretation of Kong was more ape like and followed the traditional story. This time round, he's gone full Rambo. Smashing, breaking and demolishing whatever was in his way. Sadly, and I was hoping Legendary would learn after Godzilla, Kong isn't featured as much as I would have liked. He has a blistering introduction to our main group but then is interspersed throughout as an aid when the humans are struggling against the other creatures on this island. What this film eventually boils down to is the Skull Island portion of a regular King Kong film. A more appropriate title would simply be 'Skull Island'. That being said, the design for the other monsters are imaginative and expertly executed. The Skull Crawlers are just as grotesque and frightening as the residents of the island suggest plus, there is an incredible bamboo-legged Spider that helps create a significant moment in the film. If you've ever seen Cannibal Holocaust, you may know exactly what I'm on about and that should scare you. As for the plot of the movie, it's extremely brisk. If you blink, you'll miss all of the exposition and before you know it, you're already aboard the helicopters to Skull Island. This energetic pacing works in the films favour as it never falters nor drags which enables the audience to strap in for the ride. Kong: Skull Island is like Apocalypse Now with fantasy creatures all compiled into a rollercoaster ride. Do not get me wrong, if brainless action flicks that aim to only entertain whilst you shove heaps of popcorn into your mouth aren't you thing, then Kong: Skull Island will most probably not appeal to you. However, if you want to see giant creatures go one on one with each other, then I highly recommend seeing this. With the film being set in the 1970's, it also means that we get a killer soundtrack full of rock tunes. Believe me when I say that having Black Sabbath's Paranoid blaring out whilst Kong is using helicopters as boxing gloves is as awesomely ridiculous as it sounds. I would also highly advise sticking around for an after credits scene, especially if you aren't caught up on the news surrounding the future of Kong. It's safe to say, it's got me unbelievably excited for what's to come.
Kong: Skull Island is a film that doesn't take itself too seriously, revels in the ability to kick its feet up and enjoy the destruction but most of all, have fun which is quite refreshing when most action films nowadays focus on wanting to reinvent the genre. Unfortunately, the horrendously written characters are too big of an issue to ignore. It's enjoyable and full of moments that you will remember for how cool they are but I can guarantee that Jackson and Reilly will be the only humans that you give a damn about.
My Verdict: 7.5/10
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