Rampage - movie review
Rampage
Plot: When three different animals become infected with a dangerous pathogen, a primatologist and a geneticist team up to stop them from destroying Chicago.
Cast: Dwayne Johnson, Naomie Harris, Malin Akerman
Director: Brad Peyton
Certificate: 12A (moderate violence, threat, brief gory images, rude gestures)
Runtime: 1hr 47 mins
Release Date: Friday 13th April 2018
Usually in the introduction to my reviews, I like to make some witty comments or remarks about the film but with Rampage, I can't. It's impossible for me to make fun of the plot because it's ridiculous enough as it is. Dwayne Johnson vs a giant ape vs a giant wolf vs a giant crocodile. There's silly. There's dumb. And then there's Rampage dumb.
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| Because caging a giant ape on a plane seemed like such a good idea at the time... |
Those that know me understand that as much as I love solid independent filmmaking, movies that swamp awards seasons or gigantic film franchises that have a special place in my heart, I'm always partial to an insane action blockbuster that negates a plot or logic and goes for balls to the wall fun. Recent examples include the recent entries into the Fast & Furious franchise and the first Pacific Rim, and after seeing the trailer, I was expecting Rampage to slide right into that category. Brad Peyton's previous work with Johnson was the thoroughly enjoyable and incredibly preposterous, San Andreas, and in 2018, the two have undeniably raised the stakes (if that was even possible). Unfortunately, some of these blockbusters can be too stupid for their own good and Rampage is exactly that. Considering the outlandish plot that spawned from an 80s video game, I thought Rampage could have gone the extra mile for ridiculousness. At times, I could feel Peyton and his screenwriters holding back in the hope that some of the audience could take it seriously. The monsters take a backseat whilst Johnson and Naomie Harris attempt to save the world and for film that bills itself on absolute carnage, there's a lot of people sitting in boardrooms and talking. Johnson plays Davis Okoye, a former Special Forces soldier turned primatologist who looks and acts like every single character of Johnson's in the past decade. At this rate, Johnson is literally playing himself in every single film of his. Usually, this would be disastrous but because Johnson seems to possess an endless amount of charm and charisma, he gets away with it.
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| Waking up for the open shift like... |
What I love about Dwayne Johnson is that he's carried over his work ethic from WWE. He's seemingly starring in a brand new film every other week and no one can say that he doesn't give 110% to the role. In Rampage, he chews up the scenery and chaos like it's a light morning snack and saves the film from slipping further into mediocrity. He also does a good job interacting with his trusty ape-friend George and their relationship was mostly entertaining. Jason Liles, who brings George to life through motion capture, is very strong in the role and works well with Johnson but aside from these two, every other performance is either forgettable or downright terrible. Naomie Harris does what she can but her character is entirely reduced to following around Johnson like a lost puppy or giving incredibly forced exposition whenever the plot requires. Later into the film, the two run into Jeffrey Dean Morgan who, instead of deploying his Texan charm, is sidelined as the cold-hearted asshole who eventually teams with our leads however, Morgan is completely monotone throughout that you could mistake him for a cardboard cutout of Negan from The Walking Dead. But the award for worst performances of the year so far graciously go to Malin Akerman and Jake Lacy. This insufferable pair play sinister siblings that mastermind the chemical that transforms these animals into city-destroying monsters and they increasingly infuriated me with every minute they appeared onscreen thanks to their bumbling personalities and cookie-cutter, generic motivations.
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| I do hate it when my Amazon delivery is a day late. |
FACT: The sign language sign Davis uses for himself (down-facing fist on top of other down-facing fist) is actually the sign for rock.
Big, dumb fun. Only two of those descriptions apply to Rampage. It's huge. It's extremely stupid. Fun? Not really. The final act of Rampage is fairly exciting because that's what it's been building to all this time but leading up to the final showdown is surprisingly uneventful. Featuring a plane crash eerily similar to last year's The Mummy and an escape from the zoo that will make Disney's Animal Kingdom shudder in fear, Rampage just hasn't got a clue what it's trying to achieve. It's lost in the madness of itself. When monsters are fighting and devastating the city of Chicago, WETA do an incredible job with the visual effects but for a film called Rampage, I wanted more destruction. I was sitting in my seat waiting for Peyton hit a button labelled "Fuck It" and make the animals even bigger and the carnage even more explosive. Alas that didn't happen. Instead, there's quite a shocking amount of graphic violence that might unsettle younger viewers so I'd suggest that, if you do ignore my advice and see Rampage, leave the little ones at home. But Rampage's biggest flaw is its distinct lack of focus. It's trying 101 different things including planting a heartfelt yet hamfisted attempt at an anti-poaching message but can never make any of them work. Who are we supposed to root for in this scenario? George is involuntarily turned into a monster so we don't want to see him hurt yet when he mauling human beings to death, it becomes a little difficult for us to side with him. We obviously want the humans to put a stop to the senseless destruction but at the same time we don't want them to kill George. As for Dwayne Johnson, he's stuck in the middle like we are but never makes a compelling enough point to fully root for. Need I mention the dialogue? In a movie like this, which type of dialogue do you think you're going to get? A) Witty, razor sharp conversations between characters that delve into the human soul, or B) Cheesy, corny one-liners that you can repeat word for word if you've seen movies like this before? I'll let you decide what you think is the right answer.
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| A wolf with wings. Did a six year old write this? |
Add this up to another Dwayne Johnson blockbuster albeit a less memorable one. Johnson is building an action filmography the likes of which we haven't seen since the stars of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone. It's one giant mess that could have redeemed itself if it went that extra mile but seemed too afraid to take the step.
My Verdict: 5.5/10
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