The Great Wall - movie review
The Great Wall
Plot: European mercenaries searching for black powder become embroiled in the defense of the Great Wall of China against a horde of monstrous creatures.
Cast: Matt Damon, Jing Tian, Willem Dafoe
Director: Zhang Yimou
Certificate: 12A (moderate fantasy violence, moderate language)
Runtime: 1hr 43 mins
Release Date: Friday 17th February 2017
When Ancient China is under attack, green Lizards are close to destroying the formidable wall and there's nothing that multi colored, bungee jumping, drumming soldiers can do, only one man can save the day. His name? MERT DERMON. I think it's important to know that, before seeing this film, I thoroughly encourage you to watch the trailer because if you don't know what The Great Wall entails, you're going to be seriously confused and probably hate the film. The Great Wall has nothing to do with building the wall or a key moment in Chinese history. This is, 100%, a fantasy.
Before anyone jumps into the comments, complaining how Matt Damon shouldn't be in this film because his appearance is Hollywood whitewashing, but in actual fact, his character is European and the film focuses on him and his friend (Pedro Pascal) encountering this Chinese army so it make sense why an actual Chinese actor wasn't cast. That being said, it wouldn't be that difficult to tweak the story to suit a casting of a Chinese actor but at the end of the day, Hollywood is a business and they're out to make money. Casting Matt Damon makes money, well, at least more money than a cast full of nobodies. As for Damon's actual performance, it's unfortunately lacklustre. Damon plays William, a thief and outlaw who mistakenly runs into the fortified wall and is captured by the Chinese army. William lacked any real characterisation. He's fairly straight faced and typical and it's not as if Damon isn't given anything to work with. The writing for William is entirely unoriginal but it's not terrible. Damon is a talented guy and well respected actor so it's bewildering to see him not give his all for any performance. He's already proved himself in action films so this was nothing out of the ordinary for him. Worst of all, his accent is diabolical. Each character and their casting makes sense because of where they're from in regards to the story. But where is William from? It can't be America but that wasn't discovered at the time of this film. His accent does not have an ounce of English tinge to it so that would limit his country of origin to a European area. But his accent is a hodgepodge of a dozen different accents. It starts off like a drunk Scotsman (otherwise known as a regular Scotsman), then descends into a Welshman who's dozing off constantly and then finally, Damon realises his attempts are futile, also discovers that this film isn't working in the slightest, and completely gives up and goes back to his own voice. Can someone please look up where William is meant to be from though? It's keeping me up at night.
So whilst Damon isn't giving this film the time of day, there are two actors who are genuinely trying to make The Great Wall enjoyable. Jing Tian is likely to become a face you'll see pop up in a few big films after this. It's quite nice to see this strong female character, who works her way up the military ranks, not be bogged down by stereotypical Hollywood tropes. She isn't forced into a relationship with Matt Damon nor does she become a damsel in distress. Do I think her character has dumb moments? Bungee jumping off of the wall with spears in hand, stabbing enlarged Komodo dragon and their vibrating foreheads makes me think she does but otherwise, Commander Lin Mae is decently developed. The other actor who attempts to make something with this film is Pedro Pascal. Fresh off of having his head exploded in Game Of Thrones, Pascal is fun, entertaining and has this understated star quality about him, so much so, he could have been the lead if given the chance. The side story his character is involved in is terribly clunky but Pascal's likeability makes it bearable. I'm also certain that The Great Wall had an intruder on set and it slipped right through the editing cracks. Willem Dafoe has seemingly wandered onto the wrong set and winged his entire involvement before anyone spots he's broken in. Dafoe plays Ballard and his character is only there to keep Pascal's Tovar occupied whilst Damon keeps himself busy. Ballard is useless in every way imaginable. Dafoe looks bored out of his mind hence my belief that he mistakenly walked out of his trailer ,into The Great Wall and decided not to leave until the writers realised so.
FACT: Before his untimely tragic death in a plane accident, the late composer James Horner was contracted to write a score to this movie.
Not all legends need to be told. We're never going to see Arnold Schwarzenegger go Full Metal Jacket in an adaptation of The Canterbury Tales are we? China pride themselves on their extensive history so why not tell a story, from Chinese history, that can make for exciting battle scenes rather than an overblown CGI fest? The Great Wall is nothing more than a pale imitation than other fantasy war films that have come before. The whole premise itself feels like a rip-off of the Helm's Deep battle from The Lord Of The Rings. In The Great Wall's defense, the opening half an hour or so was actually quite fun. It's stupid as hell and all logic needs to be taken with a pinch of salt, but the initial conflict that we are introduced to, alongside Damon and Pascal, seemed to set the mood of how this would all pan out. Sadly, that hopeful feeling all went to pot as the film progressed. The Great Wall follows a very typical and dull structure. Introduce the characters, big battle, talk about the big battle and give some exposition, reveal some emotional context about characters, a mild battle with big consequences, all looks lost and then final battle. There comes a point, probably at the midway mark, when I lost interest. Character development is almost nonexistent and the story may as well have been thrown out of the window. On the upside, it is beautiful in a visual sense. After I watch a film, I usually come up with a short, one sentence remark. For this, it was thus; The Great Wall is a feast for the eyes but the eyes alone. There is no denying that Zhang Yimou is a brilliant visual director. Where he comes into trouble, is narrative. Simply the craftsmanship of the grand sets alone are stunning. We also have eye-poppingly beautiful costumes that contain every colour under the sun. The special effects aren't as glorious as the production design but it is still very impressive. I saw the film in 2D but from the way certain shots were composed, like an arrow flying out towards the screen or a jumping green beast, 3D might have made for a more visual impact. Perhaps watching it in 3D might have distracted me from the terror that was its story? By the end of the film, I was neither underwhelmed nor angry. The Great Wall just wasn't very good.
Visually, this is a stunning film and it's no surprise that it has become the most expensive Chinese film ever made but aside from that and two of its stars (Tian and Pascal), The Great Wall is certainly not as great as its title may suggest. Simply put, this is the most beautiful looking B-movie ever made.
My Verdict: 4/10
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